How Secure Are YOUth?

While everyone else in this country seems to be discussing whether the personal risk of undergoing a full body airport scan is worth the national security it intends to bolster, we wanted to ask our youth what “security” means to them.

We began by going around the room 2 or 3 times brainstorming the first thing the youth thought of when they heard the word “security.” We allow passing, but encourage them just to say whatever comes to mind, even if it's stupid or has already been said, so everyone gets involved.

Youth came up with words like blanket, social, safety, shelter, freedom, passwords, national, teddy bear, puppy, government, acceptance, water, roof, insurance, job, locks, seatbelts, etc.

We did the same thing with the word “insecurity” which initially proved to be harder for them, but eventually they came up with an interesting list which included words like “gay” “female” “emotional” “body” “Arizona” “sick” and some choice others.

Then we asked every youth to write on different small pieces of paper 5 things which for them were necessary for their own security. When they had finished, we told them that a unforeseeable event resulted in the loss of one of them, and made them choose one to throw away. We continued to present them with various circumstances which forced them to get rid of another, then another, and finally another so they were left with only one, and asked them to share which they had chosen to hold on to, and why.

We concluded with a discussion of the following questions:

Would you define personal security the same way as the people you live with would? Why or why not?
Describe a time when you experienced complete safety or security. What was special about this experience? What made it so safe or secure?
Describe an experience in which you felt completely unsafe. What made it so unsafe? What happened?
What does a child need most to feel secure? What would be on your top ten list?
What kinds of situations or conditions create the most insecurity for young people today?

"During the cold war, peace and security tended to be defined simply in terms of military might or the balance of terror. Today, we have a greater appreciation for the non-military sources of conflict. We know that lasting peace requires a broader vision, encompassing education and literacy, health and nutrition, human rights and fundamental freedoms. We know that we cannot be secure amidst starvation. We cannot build peace without alleviating poverty. We cannot build freedom on foundations of injustice."
- Kofi Annan, General Secretary, United Nations

What do you think about this quote?

What are some tangible things you can you do to ensure that others do not lose or are able to have access to things that are of importance to their, and by extension our, security?

Personal Branding for YOU(th)

If you work with youth, you know how important social media is to them. Recently, Sean O'Brien (our amazing co-director of all things youth) and I were looking for a more interesting way to begin a discussion with our group about what they post online. The resulting meeting was so successful that I thought I'd share it.

We began with a “name that slogan” game, just for fun: paired the group up, gave each paper and pencil, and read them 15 famous slogans. They wrote their answers then traded papers to see which pair correctly named the most brands associated with each slogan. Here are a few; many more are easily googled:

I'm lovin' it – McDonalds
Think different – Apple
Just do it – Nike
Snap Crackle Pop – Kellogg's Rice Krispies
The ultimate driving machine – BMW
The other white meat – pork

We followed up the game with a brief discussion about what brands were popular now (Uggs were still very “in” while McDonalds was decidedly “out”). We had them think then talk about how much time and effort they spent “branding” themselves, how they did it, and what image they hoped to portray to others about who they were based on the brands they purchased or steered clear of.

Then we gave each youth a large piece of paper, markers, and the following handout:

The field of leadership studies has a term, 'Impression Management' which you may also hear referred to as 'personal branding.'

Imagine you could create a billboard to advertise YOU to the whole world. What image would be on it? What would it say? How do you want to be seen by the outside world?

Consider the following questions, then draw your billboard:

What stands out about you?

What makes you different from your peers?

What's your greatest strength?

What's your most noteworthy personal trait?

What are you proud of?

What should you take credit for?

What image do you want to portray to others about who you are on the inside?

When youth finished drawing their billboards, they shared as they were willing (most had worked diligently on their billboards and were eager to take part)! We then had them turn their papers over, and told them,

“Impression Management is essentially your reputation – and often, what others say about you is more important than what you convey about yourself. On the back of your papers, add the graffiti that others have spray painted over your billboards – the stuff that others say about who you are or who they perceive you to be. True or not, this is the stuff that isn't who you want to be known to the world as.”

After graffitiing their billboards, youth once again shared. The discussion began fairly seriously: how difficult it is as a youth (when you're changing so quickly) to change others' ingrained perceptions of you; how hard it is to change your reputation if it's bad, but how easy it is to maintain your reputation if it's good (even if you do bad things); how one person can make or break your reputation with one slanderous rumor; etc.

We ran out of time and had to cut that discussion short, but in conclusion we presented the group with the following questions to consider:

You may not get to create a billboard on the side of the highway, but in what other public places are you advertising to the world who you are?

Do you use facebook, twitter, and other social media to your advantage, or to your detriment?

Do your “friends” and “followers” support the image you want to portray of yourself or do they contribute more in the way of “graffiti”?

Beginning Again

After a rather long (baby) hiatus, I'm back. Is anyone out there anymore? I guess we'll find out.

Anyway, here's an interesting project we did at the beginning of this year with a new group of youth who didn't know each other very well. It'd be fun for any group at any time of the year though.

FACEBOOK PHOTO ESSAY

Needed: one facebook page (create one for your group; it's easy and you'll seem cool to them if you do), one digital camera, and enough 8 1/2x11 white paper and black thick markers for everyone.

After a general intro and check in, I asked each youth to think of one thing they'd like others to know about them. It could be something that might affect how they were viewed in the group, or something they wanted to make sure others knew, or... really anything they wanted to add but hadn't felt comfortable sharing in their check in.

Each youth wrote their statement in LARGE letters on their white paper, and we took each one outside individually for a photo. They got to direct the photo shoot themselves, so they picked a place and pose that corresponded to what they had written.

After the meeting, all the photos were posted on our group facebook page (untagged so they remained private and viewable only to our group; the one posted here is with permission). Each youth was asked to post a "comment" during the next week on everyone else's photo and statement.

The result: a great photo essay about our youth that generated tons of wonderful and insightful comments; an activity that youth who had not been part of could still participate in; an activity that built trust among the youth; and a chance for youth to get to know each other in their own time and outside the church.

Youth, on Youth Group, Part III

What makes youth group special? We asked the ones who know
best: our youth!
Here is the third article in the series of 3:

EMPOWERMENT by Catherine

Our youth group, even though it’s as large as it is, has found that it can accomplish many things, run smoothly, have a great time, AND empower individuals – with two adult leaders (not advisors!) and without a steering committee, president, treasurer, and the likes.

A big part of what we all get from this group is the skills we need to be leaders, in our group, in our church, and in the world. Part of what our leaders – Jessica and Sean – do, is to give everyone the skills, support, and opportunities to be a leader, and anyone can be a leader in any activity where they’re comfortable. In WUSYG there are opportunities to lead meetings, worship, overnights, dinners, concerts, and basically anything we can think of, and if we don’t think of anything, our leaders encourage us to try our hand at leading something at one time or another, either individually, or in small groups. By having skilled leaders rather than youth or advisors running a lot of our meetings and activities throughout the year, we learn a lot just by watching them and participating in the things they plan. From that, we learn how to organize our own things with their support: we learn how to lead discussions, how to plan service trips, how to construct a worship service, and a bunch of other things that we just wouldn’t necessarily know how to do, or have the skills to do.

As part of our youth group we are given opportunities to achieve things we never would have thought we could. The largest example of this occurs on our Habitat trips. On these week-long trips, we are given the opportunity and skills to achieve something very tangible. Framing a wall for a house for the homeless family whose daughter is working beside you is amazing; for some of us, finally getting a nail in without bending it is the most empowering thing we’ve experienced in years!

There are a dozen more ways that the youth are empowered within and by our group and its activities, but it is important to mention that youth involvement in the church and congregation are also significant. Our congregation accepts us as part of the larger community; it is part of their commitment to our Youth Group. With this acceptance, the youth are given the opportunity to serve on committees and have a voice. We have youth on nearly every committee in our church; youth are teachers, and sextons, and a lot of other things as well. By allowing for this involvement, the church has given us opportunities to become active and accept more responsibilities, and we learn how to be responsible with our power, and how to work with others.

The kinds of things we’re empowered to do in our youth group and in our church is not something we get at school, or through sports teams, or really anywhere else in our lives. In our church we are given the chance to learn about people different from us, the chance to make a difference, the chance to learn about ourselves, to learn from others who are older and wiser or more experienced, the chance to use our power wisely, and the chance to become someone who will build off all these experiences we’re given, and use them not just in our youth group, but in our community and the larger world.

Youth, on Youth Group, part II

What makes youth group special? We asked the ones who know best: our youth!
Here is the second article,  in a series of three:
CONTENT by Sam
WUSYG (the Winchester Unitarian Society Youth Group), like many other youth groups probably, creates a covenant at the beginning of the year. Contained in our covenant is our understanding that a group cannot function without dedication. We believe that trained and experienced leaders who model and build that dedication among us are absolutely crucial to creating a strong and committed youth following.
WUSYG has both a ¾ time youth director and a 1/4 time assistant youth director who are a part of the church’s payroll. For us, a youth group without experienced leaders is like a choir without a music director, or a congregation without a minister, and just like hiring a music director or searching for a minister, hiring the right leaders for a youth group is an extensive process that must be completed carefully and with input from the youth; youth group leaders need to understand the workings of a group and group development and dynamics, and must also be passionate about working with youth and knowledgeable about ministry to teens.
WUSYG’s leaders – Jessica and Sean – are not there to reprimand or control the group, but rather to guide and aid the group’s growth and provide knowledge, skills, and focus for the youth. We think that often, group leaders spend too much time focusing on just providing fun stuff to draw youth in, and not focusing on the culture or the dynamics of the group. Or, at the opposite side of the spectrum, they run youth group like an extension of RE classes and just try to teach us stuff that we may or may not be interested in. Other youth groups may just be left to fend for themselves, and develop their own programming and lead their own meetings and worship and activities with some help from adults. Because we have experienced leaders who share a full time job, we have a large program that offers us a little of all of that: social events, small groups, worship, education, service trips, community-building activities, and leadership opportunities. And, in turn, we have a very large and diverse group of youth. Whatever it is they’re looking for in a youth group, they can probably find it at WUSYG because we offer a little of everything.
As a youth director, Jessica spends a lot of time working on ways to develop leadership opportunities for youth. She does not rely on the same people to head each project, but rather encourages many people to lead activities, worship, fundraisers, etc. When a youth member leads a project for the group, he or she develops a strong dedication and loyalty to the group that can only grow, and gains skills that he or she will later pass along to new members. At the same time, Jessica doesn’t let us lead everything, and we don’t spend the majority of our time working on projects or planning things.
For example, weekly Sunday meetings for WUSYG are almost always leader-led and focused on a certain thought or theme which forces us to analyze current events and think about relevant issues. Our leaders create an environment where youth are free to express opinions and respectfully debate ideas with one another.
So, we don’t plan or lead our Sunday meetings… so what do we do, and how and when do we do it? Youth in the group organize and plan quite a bit on our own, and the largest influence on our organization for WUSYG is an e-mail list. This has been key for organizing events and letting everyone know what’s going on and what we need help with.
Of course, we can’t accomplish everything we need to do on computers. When we need to meet and organize, we’ll often use Wednesdays for that. If it’s a smaller group that needs to meet, they’ll all communicate and figure out when is best for all of them.
For us, leadership comes in as many different forms as we have different kinds of people in our group. While some people organize large-scale fundraising concerts, others participate in discussions and provide thought-provoking ideas. Some group members lead silently through their complete dedication to the group, and attend almost every single group event. Others lead by taking charge when no one else will. Our adult leaders do lead, and not just advise, but our youth all lead and advise as well, and it’s the balance that makes it possible for our group to do as much as we do, and what makes our group work so well.

Youth, on Youth Group

Straight from the horse's mouth! We asked our youth to write about what makes their youth group 
special.
Here's the first, in a series of 3 articles I'll post here over the next few days.

OUR CULTURE, by Anna

We know that in all UU youth groups and district events there are certain things that are expected of the youth who attend: things like don’t use drugs, don’t have sex or exclusive relationships, no drinking, and so on. We also know that even when these things are aspired to, or even if youth sign on the line and agree to them, it doesn’t always mean that there won’t be drinking, or sex, or whatever, happening.

Our group is a little different: we aspire to and agree to not using substances or having exclusive relationships in our group, and we don’t. Honestly, we do not have ANY problems with drugs, alcohol, sex, exclusive relationships, or other substance abuse at our events, meetings, retreats, or service trips.

And it’s not because we’re a bunch of goody-goodies either—in fact, the town we come from has a very disturbing reputation for being a very heavy drinking/drugging town; and obviously, we’re not immune to that. The truth is that most of us don’t make it through our high school years without some experimenting—with some doing a lot more “experimenting’ than others. And it’s not like kids in our group don’t have intense relationships or go out with others in the group—in fact, some of our youth have been dating for several years -- but you would NEVER know it when you’re at a youth group meeting or event.

Our youth group is sacred space—we’ve worked hard to make it a place that’s free from the stuff that’s around us all the rest of the time, and we talk about the reasons we want our group and our activities to be free from those things that are so pervasive in the rest of our lives. We agree not to have exclusive relationships, use drugs, alcohol, etc—and we don’t.

It’s not always easy and it takes work, and let’s face it: drugs, alcohol, sex, and other substance abuse are a huge part of teen life whether people like it or not. But although this may be part of some of our youth’s lives, it is never part of their life at the youth group. It doesn’t even need to be said. It all goes back to respect. By bringing substances into the group, you not only run the risk of being caught and reprimanded by the leaders, but even worse, you run the risk of disappointing the group. The way we see it, by bringing substances into our group, its almost as if you’re saying, “you people aren’t enough to have fun—I need more!” or “I don’t feel comfortable with you or myself, so instead of working on that, I’m going to take the easy way out.”

And by the way: we have never been asked to sign anything stating that we will behave a certain way in our group or at our events or retreats or trips. The first time I was ever asked to sign anything like that for a youth group event was this past April, when I went on a UUSC work trip to the Mohawk Farm in New York. We were all required to sign this contract. It’s your typical contract, sign on the dotted line. Honestly, I didn’t even read it—I just signed it. I’m sure I know what it said: no sex, no drugs, blah blah blah. It’s not that it’s not important—it’s just that we all know already that adults expect of us. What’s more important really is what we expect of each other and why, and signing on a dotted line doesn’t give anyone any opportunity to talk about their own personal beliefs, or the reasons why the rules and guidelines for the trip are there, or anything that is really important, like respect for each other, our leaders, not wasting the opportunity that is being given to us, or violating the trust we have in each other. When you talk about those things, and hear how others feel about them, it becomes really obvious that that kind of stuff is so much more important and rare and valuable than a few beers would be.

When our youth group goes on a service trip, for example, we aren’t asked to sign on a dotted line. Instead, we are asked to write our own covenant, which includes what we feel should be the guidelines for the trip, why, and what really matters. In general, these covenants are a way for each member to say whatever is on his or her mind, to talk about what s/he wants from the trip, ad how s/he thinks that can happen. Everyone is required to write one because, although most of us want similar things, we are all really different, and we have different needs and ideas as well. We read them aloud, but anonymously, every night throughout the trip, and it really makes us feel proud to be doing something (or not doing something) that no one expects of us anywhere else in our life. It’s a big deal, and it’s something we’ve chosen to do on our own, and it’s something that a lot of people really respect us for. Sex, drugs, and alcohol is a whole lot easier to come by than the kind of pride and respect we get from this…And it’s interesting, because it’s not just adults that respect us for this; kids in our school really want to be part of something like this too, and that’s one reason why our group has grown so much I think.

Online Discussion Guides

If you haven't read YES! magazine, you should start! We love it.  
Added bonus: their discussion guides are absolutely perfect for 
senior high youth groups. Take a look at them here. You're
guaranteed to find a whole slew of great themes, engaging articles,
and ready-made questions for your group.

Discussion with Large Groups

We have the happy problem of having too many kids. It makes 
discussions virtually impossible, but other than Wink and Capture 
the Flag, it's what the majority of youth in our group want on a 
Sunday evening.
Here's one technique that would work well with any number of kids though, and it's a nice change from the circle or fishbowl. Have each youth write down a controversial situation. This could be 
anything from the Iraq war, to having a friend who makes racist or 
homophobic comments, to being in a situation where alcohol or drugs 
are being used.
Put a long piece of masking down across the floor of your room, and label one end AGREE/APPROVE and the other DISAGREE/DISAPPROVE.  
Have youth exchange papers with one another, and ask for 2 volunteers.
Have the first volunteer read what is on his paper. Ask the second
volunteer to take a stand on the tape line which represents how she feels about the situation. She should explain why she chose the position on the line which she did.
At that point, the rest of the group is invited to give arguments (pro/con) or make comments about the situation in an attempt to change the mind of the person standing on the tape line, who will move and respond to comments from the individuals in the group if she feels so inclined.
Continue until it's boring, then choose two more volunteers.
This isn't only an interesting way to create a vibrant discussion, it's also a good chance for youth to see peer pressure at work, to find out what "moves them", to see the influence they have on others, and so on.
 

Another great site for resources

Here it is, more different ideas that are easy to lead.  Search for ideas by exercise or outcome.  Everything I've used from here has been great!

Searchable database of activities, exercises, and games

Searchable by keyword, type of tool (icebreaker, simulation exercise, etc.), or topic, this website has a bunch of great and different activities for your meetings! Enjoy.

Everything Old is New Again

Some of the exercises I love the most only work one time with any
one group.  Once you do them, the secret is out, and you can't use
them again for, oh, four years or so, until the new generation comes through the doors and all your old stuff is new again.
Over the years, I've discovered many ways to reuse and recycle
great games and meetings, making them more challenging and
different and thus useful at least every two years, if not every year. One favorite of mine and our group is the Broken Squares Exercise.

Play it once with your group - it's a great one - but if you want to
play it again, try this small change: eliminate one person per group, and eliminate one square.  The trick? tell the group they still have to create 5 squares.  The answer: they will need to build 4 individual squares which together create one larger, 5th square.

For the youth who think they know this game, it becomes extra tricky as they are forced to think outside the box (square!). Some will insist you did it wrong; others will figure it out eventually.  Change your follow-up questions to suit your particular group situation, or have them create their own questions based on their 
experiences.

"Peace on Earth, Goodwill towards all"

We had a great meeting last night which I thought I'd share for anyone who wanted to borrow it.
We started with a game we call Plates, but I've seen it called "Islands" in other books.  Have your group stand in a circle around some paper plates scattered in the middle. Explain the game: "when I say go, you must run and touch a plate. Anyone who touches anyone else at any point is out.  The last person to touch a plate in each round (or anyone not touching a plate) is out.  Go!" At the end of each round, take plates out.  Last night, I had youth who lay on plates, snatched plates and ran, etc.  The game was over in minutes. Other years I've had youth who've also immediately ripped the paper plates into small bits and distributed them around the circle so that no one was ever out.  See what your group does!
We followed up with these questions for discussion, and would have concluded with candles for the last question had we not run out of time:

Is there a way to play the game so that no one is ever “out”? Is there any reason NOT to play the game that way?

You have all heard this famous quote of the Christmas season, "on earth peace, goodwill toward men."
Most of us want world peace, but where do you start? Is it possible to have world peace without goodwill – fostering cooperation and trust – right here among your peers? Is it possible to have a good relationship with others if you don’t have inner peace yourself?

Questions:

1) When in your life do you experience cooperation or a sense of community? Where do you experience competition or conflict?

2) Conditions that create conflict are:

- instability
- inequity
- powerlessness
- fear
- uncertainty
- unclear boundaries
- conflicting beliefs

Going around the circle, have each person name and describe some of the biggest conflicts you’re experiencing in your life right now. Can the root of each person’s conflicts be traced to one of the above categories?

3) What do you think about this quote: “World peace will never be stable until enough of us find inner peace to stabilize it.”

4) What sorts of things do you do or say everyday that show you are at war with yourselves or others?

Worship: Peace Pilgrim wrote, “There is a criterion by which you can judge whether the thoughts you are thinking and the things you are doing are right for you. The criterion is: Have they brought you inner peace? If they have not, there is something wrong with them -- so keep seeking! If what you do has brought you inner peace, stay with what you believe is right."

What brings you inner peace?

Fundraising

It's that time of year. We've got to make money, and quick.
When you have to earn in excess of $25,000, which we do for our service trip this year, bake sales and car washes just don't cut it. 
We've gotten good at raising (a lot) of money over the years. We've done spaghetti suppers and pancake breakfasts; published a church recipe book; offered Friday night Kids Nights Out (babysitting at church) and photos with Santa; hosted rock and folk concerts, a dance-a-thon and a contra dance; done Christmas Tree sales and dump runs; provided yard work, snow shoveling, computer and tv/stereo component set-ups; sold carol-grams and Gingerbread House Kits for Humanity; and delivered pies at Thanksgiving and subs on Super Bowl Sunday.
Basically, if you name it, we've done it. We even admit to selling the donated Sunday Social Hour food once when we were really hard up (which gave us the idea to sell lunch after church on Sundays!).  This year we're selling everything from stock in our trip to jewelry made out of hardware, electrical, and building supplies.  
Since the reality show The Apprentice aired, we've also divided our youth group into smaller teams of 5-10, had them create team names and posters, and compete to see which team could come up with the best fundraiser and earn the most money.  
It's a lot of work, and as several parents each year will always point out to me, it would probably be easier to just ask each youth to pay for the total cost of his/her trip, or to contribute some amount of money for our youth program expenses.  
But fundraising not only builds our bank account. It builds responsibility, gratitude, pride, and a great team.  By the time we arrive in the Gulf Coast this February, we will already know how to work together, and we won't waste any of the precious time we have because we'll know - probably down to the last cent! - how much every minute actually counts.

Diversity in Youth Group

We have a pretty diverse youth group ourselves; at least it 
appears that way from the outside. 
When we ask our youth about the diversity in their own group, 
they are much more likely to talk about the social groups 
that the various members of our youth group belong to -
band geeks, preps, jocks, druggies, alternative folks -
it's a veritable microcosm of the cultural diversity in the world.
One of my favorite "games" to open up a discussion about this 
diversity is Barnga. For some reason, this year I forgot how
to play and ended up having to search everywhere for the rules.
I finally found them here, along with a bunch of other really cool,
similar "games" that our youth love (Bafa Bafa, Prisoner's
Dilemma, and Brief Encounters being all-time winners).
If you try any others, let me know!

Reflections on New Orleans video by WUSYG

Thanks for all your interest in this video!
We decided to put it online because we can't afford postage
to mail it out to folks anymore. 
Please feel free to forward the URL to anyone you think might 
be interested; all we ask is that you leave us a note on our 
guestbook if you use it or find it useful. 
Of course, we'll also take donations as we will be continuing 
our work this year in Mississippi with Persevere Relief, 
an organization started by one of our youth group alums.
Get the video here. 

Love Your Neighbors

We love our neighboring UU youth groups!
Seems like there are a bunch of us who just don't find the time, or the ability, or the adult resources (or the desire?) to attend Cons in our area, but still really want to get to know the other UU youth nearby.
We're one of those groups, but our youth are finding new, cool ways to get to know each other and do things together, nonetheless!
Yesterday we had a great time out in Worcester, MA with the UU youth group there, led by Dave Blodgett. We got some of our musicians and singers together and played and sang at their Sunday morning service. It was a great way to get to know each other and have fun, and do something worthwhile all at the same time. Thanks for having us, Worcester!
In the past, Arlington, MA's UU youth group has joined us for a screening of An Inconvenient Truth; Belmont UU has invited us to their Halloween Party; and we've had a great time with some sunday afternoon Scavenger Hunts with other local UU youth.
We've enjoyed the time we've spent with other youth groups (twelve in all!) talking about our Gulf Coast work, too, and we're really happy that other groups have been able to make the trip down to lend a hand with some help from us (at least, we like to think we helped!).
We're always looking for new ways to connect to other youth groups outside of the Cons - stuff that appeals to a lot of different youth and doesn't take up more time of the youth advisors; and we've met so many other youth who have also been looking for this connection, that we started a list of things we hope to do in the near future with our neighbors.
Maybe you'll find some ideas here, yourself!

All day UU youth Olympics
Caroling
Dance group - folk, swing, contra, etc
Friday night rock concert, featuring bands with UU youth
Open Mike Night for UU youth
All day service project in the area
Monthly sponsorship of a local animal shelter dog
Local UU youth Adopt-a-highway
Art exhibit featuring art/photography of local UU youth
Podcasts to find out what other youth groups are doing
Videotaped round-table discussion on an issue, to be broadcast on local cable access channels
???

Help Clean up the French Quarter

"I don’t know what you have or haven’t heard about the French Quarter. I assume the news outside the New Orleans 'Bubble' portrays us as a city that is a-okay. Um, not so. New Orleans is bankrupt and operating on a $150M credit line from JP Morgan Chase. We are losing $1.5M per day in loss tourism dollars.

The FQ doesn’t have enough city workers, because there is no budget. Or at least that is the rumor. Cleaning the FQ is essential to the recovery of the area. If the city is clean, then people will come. I live in the FQ and I am sure you don’t want to hear my stories!

There are groups cleaning up the FQ. It gives you the opportunity to really check out the FQ, socialize with business owners and report back to your friends and family that yes, the FQ is still historic and beautiful and yes, operational…"

Check out this info about how to help clean up the French Quarter with a really great organization called Relief Spark. Take a group (14 year olds okay!) or take your family to the French Quarter and do some clean-up work! (With housing provided at the Royal Sonesta hotel, how can you not lend a hand?)

Processing, Sharing, Reflecting

This question comes up a lot as groups are headed off to do service projects: how do we help them process things at the end of a long and sometimes difficult day?
Here are four examples of exercises I've used that seemed to work pretty well and could be used in many situations, not just during service projects.
DRAWING:
Have small groups or pairs draw a map of their experience during the day, then share with the whole group. Maps may be literal or symbolic depending on the day! They can get pretty creative: bridges, road signs, forks in the road, the road less traveled - they'll think of things you never would!
MOVING:
Divide youth into small groups. Ask each group to take 15 minutes to prepare a "snapshot" that tells a story about their day, using nothing but themselves. One group at a time, have them stand in the center of the circle and hold their snapshot for 30 seconds or so. Ask others in the group to interpret it, then let the group posing talk about their snapshot.
WRITING:
Have youth write letters to themselves. You can have them talk about something in particular, or have them write about what they are feeling at that moment, what they want to remember a month from now, etc. Give them envelopes to stuff and seal; have them address them to themselves. Collect them up and mail them to them in a month or so. Very cool - they love this.
TALKING:
Open-ended sentences are great. Go around the circle and have everyone finish them.
The hardest thing for me today was... The high point of my day was... I wish I had... I wanted to quit when... I got annoyed when... My motivation went up when... I was helped by... I was impressed by...I just need to complain for a minute about...I want to let everyone in the group know that... the last thing I want to say is...

Youth Services AND Rocking the Vote!

Okay, a two-fer:
We always want to go to other churches' youth services, and we never get to. Probably because most of us do them on the same day, or at least in the same (busy) month. So we put ours on line in the hopes others will do the same! It's here and the Order of Service is here.
The theme was "Do I Dare Disturb the Universe" so we watched it this weekend for some incentive to do a little work to get the vote out! Enjoy.

Teambuilding

I love building a great team but I hate things like ropes courses, trust activities, and the like. If we do any kind of game that has no purpose except to get people to think and work together, I like to do stuff that doesn't take a ton of prep time or require a big long explanation of how to play. I have a few favorites; this is one of them, and the youth love it too.
On index cards, make the following (one letter per card):
5 each: A E I O U
3 each: S T L M D G H N R Y
2 each: P B C F J K
1 each: Q V X Z
With masking tape, mask off a circle in the center of the room,about 2-3 feet in diameter.
On either side of the room, mask off a line.
Divide your group into 2 teams and have them stand behind their lines. Place all the index cards face down in the center circle.
Explain the rules: one person at a time from each team will run to the center, pick up an index card, bring it back to their team, and place it on their line. The next team member will then go to retrieve one index card and bring it back to their line. The first team to create a 5-letter word wins. You can add a lot of variables if it's too easy: no talking, teams may take letters from the other team's line as well as the middle circle, words must be 8 letters long, etc. If you let teams strategize between rounds of play they will get pretty good pretty quickly!

Sports and Religion

 

A post in honor of my team, the 2006 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS: THE ST. LOUIS CARDINALS!

When the Patriots were in the Superbowl, and most recently when the Red Sox beat the pants off the Cardinals in the World Series, I wrote up a few meetings about sports and religion. The group was baffled and amazed at the end of the meetings and always ask to have "that discussion" again every year.
"That discussion" is simple to set up; I generally open with two questions and have them work in teams to write their answers down.
1) What are ten things that all sports have in common?
2) What are ten things that all religions have in common?
Have them circle overlapping things and underline differences, or something like that, then read the responses aloud.
Each time I've done this, our group usually comes up with most of the following overlapping answers to the above questions: sacred gathering space, saints/prophets, gods/superstars, ritual and/or superstition, rules/discipline, scribes/mythology, symbols, believers/devotees - some become fanatics and some remain skeptics!, provide a diversion from everyday life, a sense of community and a sense of structure.
Once they've come up with their lists and read them aloud, the discussion which ensues usually needs little encouragement! Some things we've talked about: What are the differences? Could sports replace traditional religion in contemporary society? If it did what would be lacking? Etc.
If you're interested in reading more about sports and religion, check out this list of great sources.
AND CONGRATULATIONS TO THE CARDINALS! YAY!

Where are the youth when they're not with you?

Probably on their computer. 
Our youth say they spend at least several hours a night "IM"ing (instant messaging), on Myspace, or on Facebook, the now much cooler online place to hang.  Youth check their email and their Myspace/Facebook accounts on their cell phones, during lunch, in computer class, after school, before bed -- pretty much any time they can. 
With their schedules more and more structured, and their public "hang out" places more and more limited, youth find online meeting space is one of the best places to gather and talk to their friends, and to see and be seen by a broader group of their peers. 
So, if you haven't already done it for your group, go virtual!
Set up a googlegroup. It's easy to do; just go here
Once you do, you can send one message to all your youth in one fell swoop. What's better is that they can write the whole group via one email address, too.  Add all the youth you know of, whether they participate in your group or not.  
Not only do we do a lot of our planning and conversing via our googlegroup, but even our shyest kids find their voice here, send regular emails out to the rest of the group, and feel connected, wherever they are, whatever time it is, whatever day of the week it may be. 
Get a Myspace or a Facebook account.  Lots of large church youth groups have a Myspace account, where general information about their group and activities is posted.
A Facebook account will also allow you to set up an "event" and send a flyer out to your group that they can respond to, and see who is planning to attend and who isn't.  The possibilities are truly endless.
Virtual meeting spaces are "full-time, always on, intimate communities" (Misa Matsuda, in Peronsal, Portable, Pedestrian) They can't take the place of gathering in person, but for the times when you aren't in your church basement together, they are pretty great places to hang out and chill.

Experiential Learning "Games"

 Here's a great site with a ton of games and experiential learning activities, and here's another nice site with a few good "feedback" exercises for the end of a meeting or activity.
Another site with some great games and activities for meetings (with a Jewish emphasis) can be found here.
If you're really looking for a "game" game, this is a good place to start!

Pre-Service Trip Meetings

Before we write the covenants (see previous post) but after the youth have discussed and agreed on their service interests for the year and projects have been secured, I plan a variety of meetings intended to build awareness and generate discussion. WUSYG just happens to be a group of die-hard “Tatters” – our term for anyone who is ridiculously dedicated to probing and searching for the root causes of poverty and homelessness in this country, and, in turn, to building houses with Habitat for Humanity. Here’s one example of the kind of games we’ve used to focus our pre-service trip meetings and discussions:

Have one delicious aromatic piping hot delectable pizza, cut into 6 pieces (or, not enough for everyone), in the middle of your circle.

Divide youth into 4 groups:

Group 1 are those who will die if they don’t get a piece of pizza

Group 2 are the people who will hand out the pieces of pizza

Group 3 are the people who paid for the pizza. Make them give you enough money to cover the cost.

Group 4 are the ones who get to make the rules

Allow each group 10 minutes to decide how they would distribute the pizza. Bring the groups together and let each group make its case. Let groups negotiate if time permits. In the end, of course, Group 2 must do whatever Group 4 decides. Debrief and discuss. What could the pizza represent? What could each group represent? How did it feel to have power? To not have power? At what point did groups/individuals feel frustrated? How did you feel about the rules that were made and the individuals that made them? Etc.

Warning: we’ve played this game twice with completely different groups of youth, and both times we have had members of Group 1 eventually steal the pizza -- making for more interesting discussion if you can get them to come back!

Want more?
Here are some games for your congregation (from the Presbyterians)
Here is a game for a lock-in or retreat (from the ELCA)
Here is a game you can play online (from Oxfam)



 

Covenants vs. Contracts

I never ask youth to sign any behavior contracts before retreats, overnights, or service trips.  Our youth are used to signing them for everything and they have learned at best to ignore them, and at worst to violate them.  Before such events ARE held however, we talk as a group about our hopes and expectations, fears and concerns about the activity or event, and leaders remind the group about what is expected of them and why. Sometimes, we have three or four meetings for youth to talk prior to our service trips. Each youth is then asked to write his/her own covenant, which we read aloud and anonymously before or throughout the activity (peer pressure used for good, not evil!). These covenants are taken VERY seriously by the youth as the following representative samples from our last service trip show.  

"Going to New Orleans this year with the youth group is an honor and a privilege for me. Having just visited New Orleans last April before the Hurricane disasters, I was moved in a unique way by the damage of the storms, and I feel a very strongly about helping those who lost so much this past summer. As my fourth and final trip with the group, I am glad we are able to make a trip that promises to be so meaningful both for me personally as well as for those in desperate and immediate need of help.

It's basically rhetoric at this point, but I can guarantee that I won't do anything stupid to compromise this opportunity either for myself or others. No drugs, no sex, whatever. I don't really worry about this though (nor have I ever), because I know that the people in the group are respectful individuals, and care enough about these experiences not to ruin them. Obviously any rules like that that we are given to abide by will be followed... no question.

More than just following the "rules", I hope that people can be true to themselves, and respectful to others on this trip. its important to open up to the group in situations like these, and it is equally important to let others open up back without any fear of criticism or judgment. This year's group has a lot of younger WUSYs, and I'm looking forward to getting to know them better over the course of the week. I remember my first trips with the group, and how excited/nervous I was about them, and I hope that I can be as welcoming and fun for the people who feel like I did as people made me feel back in Anniston and Mount Vernon. In general, I just hope people can get along on this trip. These experiences are really the best thing that I have to remember from high school, and not just for the work I've done, but also for the memories I have and the bonds that I made with the people I worked (and played) alongside.

Also, I consider the reputation of our group around this country to be very important, and I would hate for this year, of all years, to be one where we screw it up! The hurricane disasters are a very serious matter that have seriously altered peoples lives. Our trip to New Orleans is to help these people first and foremost. Everyone in the group needs to remember this, and put in their all to accomplish the most that we can. We all need to be respectful of those who we are helping, in every way, and not lose sight of the fact that this disaster is their daily reality, not simply our chance to travel on our winter break. As a group, I think it is important that we make sure to always act respectfully, and really try to gain an understanding and appreciation for the Katrina tragedy. I feel as though a lot of what I hear on the news is that people feel like the nation just does not care... I want the people we encounter to feel that we GENUINELY care about their problems, and helping them pull through.

I know this year's trip has the potential to be as great or better than in years past, and we are all lucky to have such a unique and meaningful opportunity to do something VERY important. Basically, I just hope everyone makes the best of this opportunity on and off the work site. It looks like we have a strong group this year, and I know we can accomplish a lot in New Orleans, and be as badass as we have proven ourselves to be in years past!" - a senior

"To be brutally honest, I have no idea what to expect. Not only have I never been harmed by such destruction, I’ve haven’t even seen it in person. Hell, the most “destruction” I’ve seen is a couple of feet of snow and maybe a bolt of lightening or two. What does it feel like, look like, sound like, or even smell like? It’s something I’ve never really thought about before. The simple answer is, “It’s devastating, it’s terrible,” (preferably said in a “dufus” voice), but can two adjectives encompass what people who loose everything feel like? We are all about to find ourselves in an area where people know all these answers. How do I want to be viewed by these people? What do I want these people to think of our group? The point of this trip for me is to accomplish set goals for the group, the community, and for myself. It is test for all of these various parties. I think the group should feel a lot of pressure to make sure this trip is successful. One of the most important aspects of the trip, in my opinion, is that we leave the victims feeling as if someone cares, and hopefully a sense of hope. Its something that only human contact can accomplish. We want to be seen as kind, interesting and respectful young adults, and for this to occur, everyone needs to pitch in. The group needs to mold into one unit, everyone helping one another, so as one, we can help the victims. It is going to be a great week, and hopefully we will be able to have as profound a change on the people of New Orleans, as they will upon us. And when we leave the work site for the last time at the end of the week, our actions toward or around the victims will decide whether we will be forever remembered as “that” group, or “the” group. The opportunity we have been given has potential to make a lasting difference in the lives of many people, and that is what brings me to myself. The feeling I get from helping people who I would have never come into contact with under normal circumstances, is what makes these trips the most satisfying. While the new friendships and experiences I will have gained are very rewarding, nothing compares to what it feels like to walk away from the worksite, look back at it, and realize that you have made a difference." - a sophomore

"I promise first of all to respect everybody in the groups’ space, since I understand nobody is going to have very much and it may result in short fuses and tempers. I recognize that even the slightest bit of conflict due to these reasons would be counterproductive in an area where we need total cooperation to make any real difference. Any problems that do come up between members of the group I will resolve as quietly as possible so that the overall flow of the trip doesn’t become disrupted, hopefully on a one-on-one basis with the person. Any problems with people outside the group or questions I will try to resolve with that person or by talking to an adult immediately, before they escalate.

I will do the jobs given to me without complaint and without nosing in the business of the overseers of the rip and of the relief organization, who truly understand what needs to be accomplished, unless they solicit my opinion. In other words, I will be a faithful working stooge. I will be especially careful with tools and materials, as many of them I will never have worked with before, and I will be extremely conscientious about wearing masks and other protective clothing whenever necessary. I understand that I’m responsible not just for my own safety but also the people I’m working with, and I’ll make sure not to endanger or harm them due to carelessness. I will also be very careful about keeping my personal items organized and not holding up the group for personal reasons.

Most of all I want to WUSY G to represent itself as a group very hard workers who are more toward the adult end of the spectrum than the youth end. I think because of our numbers and the brightness of the group members that we have perhaps more potential to help than any other faction taking the trip or that will be working with us in New Orleans. I want people to look back at our time there thinking that we lived up that potential and were an absolutely vital presence while we were there. I don’t at all doubt the maturity of every member of the group. I’m sure each member of the group will be as serious about the job put as much effort into it as they put into school and their other concerns back home. I’m worried mostly that people won’t take the opportunity during the trip to sit alone (at least in mind if not in body) and try to absorb completely the magnitude of what they’re facing, even of they’re unsuccessful. I feel like in order to work in earnest and to apply ourselves fully, we need to give this idea the opportunity to hit home. Facing the damage alone in their mind will give people an idea of the sense of isolation that is incomprehensible even while on site, as long as they are the in the company of the rest of the group. I think only then can they get even a hint of what it was like for the people who lived in the area during the storm." - a junior





 

Safety

If you weren't already a little freaked out, the recent frolicking of Foley may have brought you up to date on what you should be 
very concerned about.  
Still not worried? Look at these statistics.

Check to be sure your church has the following:

- A sexual misconduct prevention procedure. Information to get started with this can be obtained from Church Law Today. They have an excellent paperback book called "Reducing the Risk of Child Sexual Abuse in Your Church" that can be purchased here for as low as .99. This will give you a great outline.

- Mandatory background checks for volunteers and chaperones.
Check out Accufax where you can do checks for as low as $17.00

You might also check with your church's insurance carrier.  Failure to have certain procedures in place or to follow certain guidelines (such as separate sleeping areas for males/females) may render your liability coverage null and void. And certainly and more importantly, withouth background checks and prevention procedures in place, your church may be an open invitation to predators. 

Web sites with GREAT lesson plans

There are only a handful of sites I've found that I go back to for 
material on a regular basis. Here are four great ones:

Teaching Tolerance
lesson plans and meetings on
service projects
poverty
anti-racism and other isms
gender
violence/bullying

Compass
lesson plans on
Children
Citizenship
Democracy
Discrimination and Xenophobia
Education
Environment
Gender equality
Globalization
Health
Human security
Media
Peace and Violence
Poverty
Social rights
Sport

Advocates for Youth
lesson plans on
Sexuality
Discrimination
Body Image
Values
Gender

Training for Change
lesson plans on
social change
group dynamics
teambuilding
diversity
anti-oppression

Themes for Meetings

In response to a question: I think the trick to great meetings that flow without being boring or getting off track is to find a common thread you can weave from beginning to end
(from checkin, to energizer, to game, to discussion, to worship, etc)
Obviously I can't always run that thread ALL the way through - nor do I always want to - but I try to keep something woven throughout. 
Here's the latest example:

Game: Don’t Spill the Water

Have groups of 3 to 8 youth lie on their backs, legs up, all feet together in the middle of the circle. Place a large bowl of water on their feet. The object of the game is for everyone in the group to take off their shoes without spilling the water.

Discussion: Walk in my shoes:

Have everyone in the group throw his/her shoes into the middle of the circle. One by one, ask youth to enter the circle, pick out a pair of shoes other than his/her own, and have a seat in the center. Have the youth whose shoes they are tell the story of what it’s like to be in their shoes. That youth then goes to the middle to pick the next pair of shoes. Debrief/Discuss.


Closing Question/Candles: Do you feel comfortable in your own shoes?



 

Meeting Online

Meeting people on line is part of our life now, and it's a way of life for most teenagers.  Here's a safe way and fun way for your whole group to gather on line.
Welcome to the wonderful world of WEBOGGLE! an online version of Boggle you can play as a team on the web from the comfort of your home.  
Pick a team name, a time, and a board (you can play 4x4 or 5x5) , then go to http://weboggle.shackworks.com/ and start the game.  If you don't remember how to play, there are instructions there, too.  All the words which individuals on your team can find will be combined and the score added together at the end of each 3 minute round of play.
WUSYG plays Monday nights from 8-9 as TEAM UNITARIANS. Feel free to join us, or just try to beat us!  One word of caution: it's VERY addictive.

A Year in the Life of a Youth Group

Working with youth groups is weird.  Where you left off in June
of last year is never where you get to pick it up in September.
Every year, you have to start from scratch (or you should);
youth graduate and new ones come in every year, which means
that you have to treat every year as a brand new group, even
though YOU may know all the players.

Here's a sample group development calendar for WUSYG:

EARLY FALL: Group orientation: what is this group? What has is it meant to people in the past? Story-telling and covenanting to establish goals and objectives (who and how do we want to be together? what do we need from this group and each other?). Conflict and cliques/subgroups are usually absent. Individual need to “fit in” is strong. Positive and constant reinforcement of group and its goals is necessary. Getting aquainted, team building, and skill building activities.


LATE FALL: Social cliques or subgroupings may have formed. Individual meetings with group members. Evaluation of activities and discussions about the group’s development. Re-evaluation/re-iteration of group goals and covenant. Social activites such as potlucks, movies, field trips. Simple, flexible leader-led meetings to encourage deeper sharing.


WINTER: Group energy, creativity, and productivity very high. Fundraising begins for week-long service projects over February and April vacations. Subgroups or individuals may have emerged as leaders, but watch for efforts to wield power and control. Offer small group (leader-chosen) and individual (leader-chosen) opportunities to plan and lead meetings, overnights, worship, all-church events, fundraising. Numerous leader-led activities to motivate and recognize group’s accomplishments; events to showcase individual talents and interests such as Open Mike Nights. Wide range of meeting topics possible; keep it relevant.


SPRING: Activities, meetings, and large-scale service trips underline group interdependence and common interests. Loyalty to the group and group morale extremely high. Provide ample opportunities for youth to create, plan, and organize activities, and share their feelings about the group and its members. The year’s culminating event (youth service, retreat, service trip) occurs by end of May or first week of June, before youth drop out due to exams, graduation, etc.