Teambuilding

I love building a great team but I hate things like ropes courses, trust activities, and the like. If we do any kind of game that has no purpose except to get people to think and work together, I like to do stuff that doesn't take a ton of prep time or require a big long explanation of how to play. I have a few favorites; this is one of them, and the youth love it too.
On index cards, make the following (one letter per card):
5 each: A E I O U
3 each: S T L M D G H N R Y
2 each: P B C F J K
1 each: Q V X Z
With masking tape, mask off a circle in the center of the room,about 2-3 feet in diameter.
On either side of the room, mask off a line.
Divide your group into 2 teams and have them stand behind their lines. Place all the index cards face down in the center circle.
Explain the rules: one person at a time from each team will run to the center, pick up an index card, bring it back to their team, and place it on their line. The next team member will then go to retrieve one index card and bring it back to their line. The first team to create a 5-letter word wins. You can add a lot of variables if it's too easy: no talking, teams may take letters from the other team's line as well as the middle circle, words must be 8 letters long, etc. If you let teams strategize between rounds of play they will get pretty good pretty quickly!

Sports and Religion

 

A post in honor of my team, the 2006 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS: THE ST. LOUIS CARDINALS!

When the Patriots were in the Superbowl, and most recently when the Red Sox beat the pants off the Cardinals in the World Series, I wrote up a few meetings about sports and religion. The group was baffled and amazed at the end of the meetings and always ask to have "that discussion" again every year.
"That discussion" is simple to set up; I generally open with two questions and have them work in teams to write their answers down.
1) What are ten things that all sports have in common?
2) What are ten things that all religions have in common?
Have them circle overlapping things and underline differences, or something like that, then read the responses aloud.
Each time I've done this, our group usually comes up with most of the following overlapping answers to the above questions: sacred gathering space, saints/prophets, gods/superstars, ritual and/or superstition, rules/discipline, scribes/mythology, symbols, believers/devotees - some become fanatics and some remain skeptics!, provide a diversion from everyday life, a sense of community and a sense of structure.
Once they've come up with their lists and read them aloud, the discussion which ensues usually needs little encouragement! Some things we've talked about: What are the differences? Could sports replace traditional religion in contemporary society? If it did what would be lacking? Etc.
If you're interested in reading more about sports and religion, check out this list of great sources.
AND CONGRATULATIONS TO THE CARDINALS! YAY!

Where are the youth when they're not with you?

Probably on their computer. 
Our youth say they spend at least several hours a night "IM"ing (instant messaging), on Myspace, or on Facebook, the now much cooler online place to hang.  Youth check their email and their Myspace/Facebook accounts on their cell phones, during lunch, in computer class, after school, before bed -- pretty much any time they can. 
With their schedules more and more structured, and their public "hang out" places more and more limited, youth find online meeting space is one of the best places to gather and talk to their friends, and to see and be seen by a broader group of their peers. 
So, if you haven't already done it for your group, go virtual!
Set up a googlegroup. It's easy to do; just go here
Once you do, you can send one message to all your youth in one fell swoop. What's better is that they can write the whole group via one email address, too.  Add all the youth you know of, whether they participate in your group or not.  
Not only do we do a lot of our planning and conversing via our googlegroup, but even our shyest kids find their voice here, send regular emails out to the rest of the group, and feel connected, wherever they are, whatever time it is, whatever day of the week it may be. 
Get a Myspace or a Facebook account.  Lots of large church youth groups have a Myspace account, where general information about their group and activities is posted.
A Facebook account will also allow you to set up an "event" and send a flyer out to your group that they can respond to, and see who is planning to attend and who isn't.  The possibilities are truly endless.
Virtual meeting spaces are "full-time, always on, intimate communities" (Misa Matsuda, in Peronsal, Portable, Pedestrian) They can't take the place of gathering in person, but for the times when you aren't in your church basement together, they are pretty great places to hang out and chill.

Experiential Learning "Games"

 Here's a great site with a ton of games and experiential learning activities, and here's another nice site with a few good "feedback" exercises for the end of a meeting or activity.
Another site with some great games and activities for meetings (with a Jewish emphasis) can be found here.
If you're really looking for a "game" game, this is a good place to start!

Pre-Service Trip Meetings

Before we write the covenants (see previous post) but after the youth have discussed and agreed on their service interests for the year and projects have been secured, I plan a variety of meetings intended to build awareness and generate discussion. WUSYG just happens to be a group of die-hard “Tatters” – our term for anyone who is ridiculously dedicated to probing and searching for the root causes of poverty and homelessness in this country, and, in turn, to building houses with Habitat for Humanity. Here’s one example of the kind of games we’ve used to focus our pre-service trip meetings and discussions:

Have one delicious aromatic piping hot delectable pizza, cut into 6 pieces (or, not enough for everyone), in the middle of your circle.

Divide youth into 4 groups:

Group 1 are those who will die if they don’t get a piece of pizza

Group 2 are the people who will hand out the pieces of pizza

Group 3 are the people who paid for the pizza. Make them give you enough money to cover the cost.

Group 4 are the ones who get to make the rules

Allow each group 10 minutes to decide how they would distribute the pizza. Bring the groups together and let each group make its case. Let groups negotiate if time permits. In the end, of course, Group 2 must do whatever Group 4 decides. Debrief and discuss. What could the pizza represent? What could each group represent? How did it feel to have power? To not have power? At what point did groups/individuals feel frustrated? How did you feel about the rules that were made and the individuals that made them? Etc.

Warning: we’ve played this game twice with completely different groups of youth, and both times we have had members of Group 1 eventually steal the pizza -- making for more interesting discussion if you can get them to come back!

Want more?
Here are some games for your congregation (from the Presbyterians)
Here is a game for a lock-in or retreat (from the ELCA)
Here is a game you can play online (from Oxfam)



 

Covenants vs. Contracts

I never ask youth to sign any behavior contracts before retreats, overnights, or service trips.  Our youth are used to signing them for everything and they have learned at best to ignore them, and at worst to violate them.  Before such events ARE held however, we talk as a group about our hopes and expectations, fears and concerns about the activity or event, and leaders remind the group about what is expected of them and why. Sometimes, we have three or four meetings for youth to talk prior to our service trips. Each youth is then asked to write his/her own covenant, which we read aloud and anonymously before or throughout the activity (peer pressure used for good, not evil!). These covenants are taken VERY seriously by the youth as the following representative samples from our last service trip show.  

"Going to New Orleans this year with the youth group is an honor and a privilege for me. Having just visited New Orleans last April before the Hurricane disasters, I was moved in a unique way by the damage of the storms, and I feel a very strongly about helping those who lost so much this past summer. As my fourth and final trip with the group, I am glad we are able to make a trip that promises to be so meaningful both for me personally as well as for those in desperate and immediate need of help.

It's basically rhetoric at this point, but I can guarantee that I won't do anything stupid to compromise this opportunity either for myself or others. No drugs, no sex, whatever. I don't really worry about this though (nor have I ever), because I know that the people in the group are respectful individuals, and care enough about these experiences not to ruin them. Obviously any rules like that that we are given to abide by will be followed... no question.

More than just following the "rules", I hope that people can be true to themselves, and respectful to others on this trip. its important to open up to the group in situations like these, and it is equally important to let others open up back without any fear of criticism or judgment. This year's group has a lot of younger WUSYs, and I'm looking forward to getting to know them better over the course of the week. I remember my first trips with the group, and how excited/nervous I was about them, and I hope that I can be as welcoming and fun for the people who feel like I did as people made me feel back in Anniston and Mount Vernon. In general, I just hope people can get along on this trip. These experiences are really the best thing that I have to remember from high school, and not just for the work I've done, but also for the memories I have and the bonds that I made with the people I worked (and played) alongside.

Also, I consider the reputation of our group around this country to be very important, and I would hate for this year, of all years, to be one where we screw it up! The hurricane disasters are a very serious matter that have seriously altered peoples lives. Our trip to New Orleans is to help these people first and foremost. Everyone in the group needs to remember this, and put in their all to accomplish the most that we can. We all need to be respectful of those who we are helping, in every way, and not lose sight of the fact that this disaster is their daily reality, not simply our chance to travel on our winter break. As a group, I think it is important that we make sure to always act respectfully, and really try to gain an understanding and appreciation for the Katrina tragedy. I feel as though a lot of what I hear on the news is that people feel like the nation just does not care... I want the people we encounter to feel that we GENUINELY care about their problems, and helping them pull through.

I know this year's trip has the potential to be as great or better than in years past, and we are all lucky to have such a unique and meaningful opportunity to do something VERY important. Basically, I just hope everyone makes the best of this opportunity on and off the work site. It looks like we have a strong group this year, and I know we can accomplish a lot in New Orleans, and be as badass as we have proven ourselves to be in years past!" - a senior

"To be brutally honest, I have no idea what to expect. Not only have I never been harmed by such destruction, I’ve haven’t even seen it in person. Hell, the most “destruction” I’ve seen is a couple of feet of snow and maybe a bolt of lightening or two. What does it feel like, look like, sound like, or even smell like? It’s something I’ve never really thought about before. The simple answer is, “It’s devastating, it’s terrible,” (preferably said in a “dufus” voice), but can two adjectives encompass what people who loose everything feel like? We are all about to find ourselves in an area where people know all these answers. How do I want to be viewed by these people? What do I want these people to think of our group? The point of this trip for me is to accomplish set goals for the group, the community, and for myself. It is test for all of these various parties. I think the group should feel a lot of pressure to make sure this trip is successful. One of the most important aspects of the trip, in my opinion, is that we leave the victims feeling as if someone cares, and hopefully a sense of hope. Its something that only human contact can accomplish. We want to be seen as kind, interesting and respectful young adults, and for this to occur, everyone needs to pitch in. The group needs to mold into one unit, everyone helping one another, so as one, we can help the victims. It is going to be a great week, and hopefully we will be able to have as profound a change on the people of New Orleans, as they will upon us. And when we leave the work site for the last time at the end of the week, our actions toward or around the victims will decide whether we will be forever remembered as “that” group, or “the” group. The opportunity we have been given has potential to make a lasting difference in the lives of many people, and that is what brings me to myself. The feeling I get from helping people who I would have never come into contact with under normal circumstances, is what makes these trips the most satisfying. While the new friendships and experiences I will have gained are very rewarding, nothing compares to what it feels like to walk away from the worksite, look back at it, and realize that you have made a difference." - a sophomore

"I promise first of all to respect everybody in the groups’ space, since I understand nobody is going to have very much and it may result in short fuses and tempers. I recognize that even the slightest bit of conflict due to these reasons would be counterproductive in an area where we need total cooperation to make any real difference. Any problems that do come up between members of the group I will resolve as quietly as possible so that the overall flow of the trip doesn’t become disrupted, hopefully on a one-on-one basis with the person. Any problems with people outside the group or questions I will try to resolve with that person or by talking to an adult immediately, before they escalate.

I will do the jobs given to me without complaint and without nosing in the business of the overseers of the rip and of the relief organization, who truly understand what needs to be accomplished, unless they solicit my opinion. In other words, I will be a faithful working stooge. I will be especially careful with tools and materials, as many of them I will never have worked with before, and I will be extremely conscientious about wearing masks and other protective clothing whenever necessary. I understand that I’m responsible not just for my own safety but also the people I’m working with, and I’ll make sure not to endanger or harm them due to carelessness. I will also be very careful about keeping my personal items organized and not holding up the group for personal reasons.

Most of all I want to WUSY G to represent itself as a group very hard workers who are more toward the adult end of the spectrum than the youth end. I think because of our numbers and the brightness of the group members that we have perhaps more potential to help than any other faction taking the trip or that will be working with us in New Orleans. I want people to look back at our time there thinking that we lived up that potential and were an absolutely vital presence while we were there. I don’t at all doubt the maturity of every member of the group. I’m sure each member of the group will be as serious about the job put as much effort into it as they put into school and their other concerns back home. I’m worried mostly that people won’t take the opportunity during the trip to sit alone (at least in mind if not in body) and try to absorb completely the magnitude of what they’re facing, even of they’re unsuccessful. I feel like in order to work in earnest and to apply ourselves fully, we need to give this idea the opportunity to hit home. Facing the damage alone in their mind will give people an idea of the sense of isolation that is incomprehensible even while on site, as long as they are the in the company of the rest of the group. I think only then can they get even a hint of what it was like for the people who lived in the area during the storm." - a junior





 

Safety

If you weren't already a little freaked out, the recent frolicking of Foley may have brought you up to date on what you should be 
very concerned about.  
Still not worried? Look at these statistics.

Check to be sure your church has the following:

- A sexual misconduct prevention procedure. Information to get started with this can be obtained from Church Law Today. They have an excellent paperback book called "Reducing the Risk of Child Sexual Abuse in Your Church" that can be purchased here for as low as .99. This will give you a great outline.

- Mandatory background checks for volunteers and chaperones.
Check out Accufax where you can do checks for as low as $17.00

You might also check with your church's insurance carrier.  Failure to have certain procedures in place or to follow certain guidelines (such as separate sleeping areas for males/females) may render your liability coverage null and void. And certainly and more importantly, withouth background checks and prevention procedures in place, your church may be an open invitation to predators. 

Web sites with GREAT lesson plans

There are only a handful of sites I've found that I go back to for 
material on a regular basis. Here are four great ones:

Teaching Tolerance
lesson plans and meetings on
service projects
poverty
anti-racism and other isms
gender
violence/bullying

Compass
lesson plans on
Children
Citizenship
Democracy
Discrimination and Xenophobia
Education
Environment
Gender equality
Globalization
Health
Human security
Media
Peace and Violence
Poverty
Social rights
Sport

Advocates for Youth
lesson plans on
Sexuality
Discrimination
Body Image
Values
Gender

Training for Change
lesson plans on
social change
group dynamics
teambuilding
diversity
anti-oppression

Themes for Meetings

In response to a question: I think the trick to great meetings that flow without being boring or getting off track is to find a common thread you can weave from beginning to end
(from checkin, to energizer, to game, to discussion, to worship, etc)
Obviously I can't always run that thread ALL the way through - nor do I always want to - but I try to keep something woven throughout. 
Here's the latest example:

Game: Don’t Spill the Water

Have groups of 3 to 8 youth lie on their backs, legs up, all feet together in the middle of the circle. Place a large bowl of water on their feet. The object of the game is for everyone in the group to take off their shoes without spilling the water.

Discussion: Walk in my shoes:

Have everyone in the group throw his/her shoes into the middle of the circle. One by one, ask youth to enter the circle, pick out a pair of shoes other than his/her own, and have a seat in the center. Have the youth whose shoes they are tell the story of what it’s like to be in their shoes. That youth then goes to the middle to pick the next pair of shoes. Debrief/Discuss.


Closing Question/Candles: Do you feel comfortable in your own shoes?



 

Meeting Online

Meeting people on line is part of our life now, and it's a way of life for most teenagers.  Here's a safe way and fun way for your whole group to gather on line.
Welcome to the wonderful world of WEBOGGLE! an online version of Boggle you can play as a team on the web from the comfort of your home.  
Pick a team name, a time, and a board (you can play 4x4 or 5x5) , then go to http://weboggle.shackworks.com/ and start the game.  If you don't remember how to play, there are instructions there, too.  All the words which individuals on your team can find will be combined and the score added together at the end of each 3 minute round of play.
WUSYG plays Monday nights from 8-9 as TEAM UNITARIANS. Feel free to join us, or just try to beat us!  One word of caution: it's VERY addictive.

A Year in the Life of a Youth Group

Working with youth groups is weird.  Where you left off in June
of last year is never where you get to pick it up in September.
Every year, you have to start from scratch (or you should);
youth graduate and new ones come in every year, which means
that you have to treat every year as a brand new group, even
though YOU may know all the players.

Here's a sample group development calendar for WUSYG:

EARLY FALL: Group orientation: what is this group? What has is it meant to people in the past? Story-telling and covenanting to establish goals and objectives (who and how do we want to be together? what do we need from this group and each other?). Conflict and cliques/subgroups are usually absent. Individual need to “fit in” is strong. Positive and constant reinforcement of group and its goals is necessary. Getting aquainted, team building, and skill building activities.


LATE FALL: Social cliques or subgroupings may have formed. Individual meetings with group members. Evaluation of activities and discussions about the group’s development. Re-evaluation/re-iteration of group goals and covenant. Social activites such as potlucks, movies, field trips. Simple, flexible leader-led meetings to encourage deeper sharing.


WINTER: Group energy, creativity, and productivity very high. Fundraising begins for week-long service projects over February and April vacations. Subgroups or individuals may have emerged as leaders, but watch for efforts to wield power and control. Offer small group (leader-chosen) and individual (leader-chosen) opportunities to plan and lead meetings, overnights, worship, all-church events, fundraising. Numerous leader-led activities to motivate and recognize group’s accomplishments; events to showcase individual talents and interests such as Open Mike Nights. Wide range of meeting topics possible; keep it relevant.


SPRING: Activities, meetings, and large-scale service trips underline group interdependence and common interests. Loyalty to the group and group morale extremely high. Provide ample opportunities for youth to create, plan, and organize activities, and share their feelings about the group and its members. The year’s culminating event (youth service, retreat, service trip) occurs by end of May or first week of June, before youth drop out due to exams, graduation, etc.

Scavenger Hunts

Scavenger hunts are boring. And what exactly do they do other 
than provide a couple hours of fun? So I started developing more interesting and, dare I say, educational lists of items. It's a great way to begin a year; invite a neighboring UU youth group to compete with you.

Here's the first Scavenger Hunt list we used in 1999 that started a WUSYG tradition that just won't go away:

THE RULES: You have two hours. All team members must be present and accounted for at that time.

You may not get in any car. You may not use bikes. You may not do anything illegal. Be good sports; don’t hurt anybody (physically or emotionally).

Our distinguished panel of judges have been instructed to give points for CREATIVITY, EFFORT, and TEAMWORK. Just because you present the judges with an item does not mean you are guaranteed the full number of points available. Judges may also subtract points for disorganization, bad presentation, noise, confusion, and anything else they feel like subtracting points for. They may offer extra credit points as well so be prepared for anything! Items must be presented to the judges in the following order:

THE LIST:
One pound of Soul Food (20)
Seven deadly sins (10)
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister (bonus points if they walk into a bar) (30)
Give us some of that ol’ time religion (10)
A beautiful stained glass window, made entirely of post-its (50)
The Garden of Eden, replete with Genesis garb. Don’t forget to eat the forbidden fruit and throw yourselves out (100)
A short, shameful confession (10)
The Tower of Babble (30)
The ugliest thing (20)
Kidnap a truant youth group member who must sit throughout the duration of the judging
and raise a loud “OBJECTION” to anything that shouldn’t be going on in church (50)
Something invisible (30)
Create a meal that breaks as many religions’ rules as possible. A menu will do, thanks (35)
Three things which, in their natural state, tell us all we need to know about your team (25)
Chutzpah (5)
A religious action figure, complete with accessories (40)
A passage from the Old Testament translated into jive (20)
Raise the consciousness of our community (40)
A sculpture entitled “this is your brain on drugs” (50)
A show of strength (10)
An altar dedicated to your idol (40)
A poem in ABACDCABACC rhyme scheme about the Scavenger Hunt (50)
Your team, stacked vertically (20)
A fashion show of Glamour “don’ts” (50)
The Fashion of the Christ (50)
A burning bush (no fire allowed so be ingenious) (10)
The official YRUU pin-up calendar (100)
Break all 10 Commandments in 1 (20)
Provide the most offensive line from our hymnal, taken out of context (30)
Count up your piercing, tattoos, chains and anything else that make you a threat to society (1
each)
Do something for charity, then tell us what you did and be prepared to prove it (100)
Pick up something nice for your judges and see if it gets you bonus points (??)
These Scavenger hunts can be dangerous! Show us your safety gear (70)
The greatest number of people in the smallest space imaginable (20 to the winner)
As many cell phones ringing as possible (20)
Create a"rule" which your team will abide by throughout the judging.
At the end of the judging, the judges must be able to correctly guess what your
"rule" was (70)

Koans

"Two hands clap and there is a sound; what is the sound of one hand clapping?"

Continuing with the idea that less structure leads to more discussion, we pull a koan out every now and then and throw it out there to see what transpires.   Here's one example of how this goes:

“A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger. He fled, the tiger after him. Coming to a precipice, he caught hold of the root of a wild vine and swung himself down over the edge. The tiger sniffed at him from above. Trembling, the man looked down to where, far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him. Only the vine sustained him. Two mice, one white and one black, little by little started to gnaw away at the vine. The man saw a luscious strawberry near him. Grasping the vine with one hand, he plucked the strawberry with the other. How sweet it tasted!”

What do you think the field represents? The tiger? The vine? The mice? The strawberry?
What are your tigers?
What is your vine?
What are you mice, the things that gnaw away at you?
What are your strawberries? What could you enjoy more?
When are you a tiger or mouse?
Do you think you’ve ever been a vine or a strawberry to someone? When and how?
What’s the point of this story?

Closing Question/Candles: What is one small thing that makes you ridiculously, blissfully happy?

Find more koans here:
http://www.ashidakim.com/zenkoans/zenindex.html
http://www.nozen.com/koans.htm
http://www.ibiblio.org/zen/cgi-bin/koan-index.pl

Beads, an ongoing activity

I came up with this idea years ago based on something Outward
Bound does. It's an excellent ongoing activity to use during service trips (or throughout a whole year) and one of only a few things our group doesn't want to change from year to year.

At a meeting at the very beginning of the week, we hand out a shoestring and pass around a bag of gold beads. One at a time, youth take a gold bead and string it on the shoestring as they talk about the things they are looking forward to, the things they’re worried about, the things they need from others in the group, and what they are going to give to the group and those in it.

At the second meeting, we pass around notecards and ask each youth to write down four qualities or characteristics they think are the most important for youth in the group to exhibit during the week. Each youth then picks a partner, and from their eight qualities they come up with four; each pair then works with another pair, and from their eight they pick four; and so on, until the entire group in this way has chosen four qualities of characteristics. Finally, each quality or characteristic is assigned a different colored bead (for example: responsibility = black; open-mindedness = yellow; good attitude = green; teamwork = purple).

For the rest of the week, we conclude every evening meeting with a bead ceremony, where each youth has the opportunity to present beads to other youth and explain to the rest of the group why s/he is presenting that particular bead to that youth. Warning: some of our bead ceremonies have lasted for more than 3.5 hours! Limit the number of beads, or try changing the rules every now and then (for instance, one night, ask youth to pick a bead and award it to themselves, and explain their choice to the group).

At the end of the week, conclude with a final bead ceremony. Pass around a special closing bead and have youth reflect on their week and the group as they take it.



 

Discussion Starters

Sometimes we don't have a meeting prepared. 
It's rare, but it happens. Here's a sampling of 
some of the great questions we've used to get a 
discussion started; usually these can take up 
the bulk of the meeting time if need be!

What can you not live without?
What's the worst injury you've ever had?
When was the last time you did something for the first time?
What's the riskiest thing you've ever done?
When did you take a chance with something and have it not pay off? pay off?
How do you think you'll know when you are an adult?
Does fear have a purpose?
Why is it so hard to trust? to love? etc
Why do people talk about changing the world, but don't work to change themselves?
What do you think the purpose of your life is?
Why do we question things? Can we question too much? Are people who don't question things happier?
If you could have wisdom, wealth, or beauty, which would you choose? why?
What do you find irresistable?
Are rules made to be broken?
What does school really teach you?
Do you want to be content?
What does it mean to be satisfied?
Why is it so hard to accept people for who they are?
How do you grieve?
Why do we care so much what others think?
What do you want that you can't have?
Why are we attracted to things that aren't good for us?
Who inspires you?
Who do you admire? Why?
Who can you rely on?
What do you dream about when you sleep?
Do you create your life, or is life something that happens to you?

Large Group Issues!

Winchester, MA now has a youth group, 9-12, of nearly 100 youth (we have about 350 in the congregation). We've been over 60 in our youth group for about 5 years now, so our kids don't remember what it was like when we had 15 (oh... but I do!!!), nor do they remember what it was like when in 2 years we went from 15 to over 40. Those were the hard years....

Where are the resources for UU youth groups when they are HUGE - or, for that matter, over 25 or so? There aren't any, really; I've had to look to other denominations to see what they are doing (they are obviously doing something right). Similarly, the YRUU model of youth empowerment which often equates to youth running their meetings and their group doesn't work well at all.

There is another dynamic that comes with growth, too: how do you get youth, who are used to a small youth group, to welcome the many changes that take place when it does start to grow, and embrace them?

Here are a couple things we did that really worked well:

What we realized in the first years when we began to explode in numbers was that the grousing about the size was a response by the youth not to the numbers, but rather to the level of intimacy they reached in the group. To combat that, we started doing a major service project early in the year. When you're building a house for Habitat and you have one week, it turns out that it is really great to have 40 youth working on it! And, in my opinion, there is no better way to quickly bond a group who don't know each other than to spend a week in pretty dismal surroundings doing really hard labor that requires teamwork. Similarly, youth in that group recognized early in the year the benefits of having more of them - they got to do more stuff, harder stuff, and "grander" stuff, and upon returning from the service trips immediately began thinking in a new way: what else could we do with this many people? It was a complete paradigm shift for them, and thereafter, meetings where they just sat around and talked or held a worship service were no longer really "enough" - those were still nice, but no longer met their perceived potential.

At the same time, we gave individuals in the group many more opportunities than they'd had previously to connect in various ways with the church "upstairs." We put a youth on every church committee, we had them doing things in services, babysitting at meetings, sextoning, teaching RE, making food for coffee hour - anything that gave them the chance to do something they were interested in and connect them to other ways to other adults in the congregation (who they then enlisted to chaperone and assist in every and any way possible).

The following year, we hired more staff and we paid them well enough that we were able to have many opportunities for our rising numbers of youth to gather throughout the week, as well as on Sundays. We run our youth group like a church, with social gatherings, choirs, service activities, Sunday worship, meetings, committees, a small group ministry program, etc. Youth have the opportunity to run events, meetings, fundraising activities, etc. during the week if they so choose, and anything is fair game as long as they put effort into it. Our Assistant Youth Director Sean O'Brien and I help them with planning and organizing those, and Sean and I run Sunday meetings and worship. Sean and I also offer occassional after-school drop-ins, potlucks, movies, open-mike nights, poetry slams - pretty much anything anyone in our group that year is interested in, we try to provide. Sean and I both also happen to be musicians, so we started choirs and bands too.

Side note for anyone wishing they could grow their youth group: I think it's important to note that after several years of just barely keeping up, we finally staffed for growth. The first year that we had an Assistant Youth Director and I went to 3/4 time, we had plenty of things on the calendar that no one showed up to. We don't have anything on the calendar that draws fewer than 15 -20 people now. I am certain that we would not have grown had we not built it first; I'm also certain we wouldn't have grown if we'd asked adults from the congregation to volunteer to do mine or Sean's job.

Anyway, having lots of different stuff for youth each week keeps our numbers down -- no one youth could possibly come to everything -- but they continue to be religious about showing up Sundays for our "large group gathering." We currently have anywhere from 50-60 on a Sunday.

These Sunday meetings always have a theme, and the following format: check-in (answer a question, or one word, etc - anything guided), game with a point, individual writing activity with a point, share in a large group, break into small groups (I pick groups) for discussion or activity, come back to large group to discuss, closing. It works really well.

Our congregation is incredibly proud of its youth program, and it has supported it financially and otherwise every step of the way. It wasn't easy to do because there just aren't that many models in the UU world for this kind of youth program, but we've proven that it is definitely possible and so incredibly worthwhile to move in this direction.



 

Check In Questions

What is check-in? A time at the beginning of meetings designed to open people up and give them a chance to talk about what's going on in their lives.

Our group can, however, easily spend its whole meeting on "check-in," so we use questions geared to keeping comments to a minimum. Here are some that have worked well:

What was the most difficult situation you found yourself in this week?
What was the worst interaction you had with another person this week? the best?
What did you spend more time doing than you wanted to this week?
What didn't you have enough time for this week?
Think of a time this past week that you really enjoyed, or a moment you wish could happen more often. What was it, and why doesn't it happen more often?
If you could relive any moment from the past week, what would it be? Would you do it the same, or differently?
Talk about something you did this week, good or bad. What do you think your actions said about you?
What was the nicest thing someone did or said to you last week?
What's something that happened this past week that you'll remember for a while?
Talk about a time last week when you did more than you thought you were capable of.
What frustrated you the most last week?
What is causing you the most anxiety right now? What's giving you the most joy?
What are you looking forward to? What are you dreading?
What was the most unfair thing that happened to you last week?
What was the most unexpected and great thing that happened?
Talk about a time this past week when you acted in a way someone didn't expect you to act.
What was the most random thing that happened to you this week? The most random thing you did? The most random thing you overheard?
Talk about a time this past week when you had a great time with your family.
What's the stupidest thing you did last week? (or didn't do - we hope)
What is one mistake you made last week, and what could you learn from it?
Talk about a situation this past week when you felt most connected to other people.
Talk about a time this week when time passed too quickly/too slowly.
What is something you did this week to help yourself?
What is one emotion you had this week that you acted on, and one you didn't act on?
Who/what rocked your world this week?

 

Service Trips to the Gulf Coast

For all you folks interested in making a trip (with youth)
to the Gulf Coast region to assist with hurricane cleanup,
here are some organizations you should check out:


IN MISSISSIPPI:

Persevere
http://www.perseverevolunteers.org/
Persevere in Pass Christian, Mississippi is a group one of our WUSY G alumni started. Her name is Rebeca Howard and you can contact her at rebeca.howard@gmail.com

Housing for Volunteers around Pass Christian/Biloxi Mississippi:
housingmanager@gmail.com
This is an Americorps-run housing facility. They can take large groups, as well as coordinate
volunteer projects. $5/night/person

More work in Mississippi:

RANDY'S RANGERS
www.randysrangers.com
randysrangers@gmail.com
601.383.3592

HOME AGAIN
Brandon Kasteler
brandonkasteler@hotmail.com
228.297.6791

IN LOUISIANA:

The HOPE Project
http://keep-hope.org
mike handley at 559-300-0433, or nichola at 773-504-4902.

UU Gulf Coast Relief contacts:
Marilee or Chere:
225-926-2291 uukatrina@bellsouth.net
http://unitarianchurchbr.com/home/home.php?linkId=1
click on Hurricane (top right)

Habitat in St. Bernard Parish:
Nan Touchard is the contact person at Camp Hope, not to be confused with Project HOPE.
Her number is (504) 401-1492
they are 16+
http://www.habitat-nola.org/projects/st_bernard_faq.php

Common Ground:
commongroundvolunteers@gmail.com